The Cancer Slow Train

The best way I describe my cancer journey is through a train ride. Years ago when I was travelling for work,I boarded a train in Saharanpur in India and there were passengers on that train that would be there for 2 days before they reached their destinations.

The Cancer journey reminds me of that train. You board the Cancer train and you get an estimated arrival time, you makes stops along the way but you cannot get off. As much as you want to abandon ship along the way you can’t, you just must stay on until you are signed off.

This is going to be a taxing journey, physically and especially emotionally. You will have ups and downs, you will get to the next station. It just may not be the station you wanted and you may have to take the scenic route.

Whats really hard on this train ride is that everyone around you will be getting on with their lives and careers. Yet you will be watching them through the window as your life feels like it’s on hold.

And on it went ..

My treatment plan involved 18 rounds of immunotherapy, you do 6 rounds with the chemo and then continue with just the immunotherapy. I was really lucky and thanks to research I was switched from having a 2 hour drip and a cannula to an injection in my thigh that takes 5 mins. My wrists and my mental wellbeing were really helped by this advance in treatment.

For the chemo part of my train journey I felt like I was holding my breath, you start and are just praying it’s going to work, I cried when after 3 rounds they told me it was working. Then I knew I would get to the other side.I just had to strap in and get on with it.

Even with this easier treatment every 3 weeks it’s the blood tests , covid tests and off to the chemo ward. It’s a grueling schedule.You feel like a bit of a fraud just popping in for a shot and a cuppa when everyone else is having the tough stuff.

At the end of January I completed treatment and  climbed off the Cancer train.Now I must get ready to board the Reconstruction train. I ignorantly thought this was going to be a fast train! But have since done my research and realise this is not the case . I must buckle up and be patient!Just like the last train I will get to my destination .This train you get off along the way and I won’t be holding my breath as I go. Cancer has taught me many things – patience being one of them!